It's All One Hundred, Brilliant And Dead

Tonight I had the opportunity to have a drunk, hot, horny, Spanish girl in my bed and I turned it down. Mostly because she was VERY drunk and I was VERY drunk and it would have been mostly passing out that we would have been sharing, but also because I miss you so goddamn much which is sick really because you don't want me at all and why should I not try to find happiness elsewhere?

And this other girl who is totally into me but has a boyfriend so is trying to hide it was telling me that I just need a good fuck to get over you and don't I know it and doesn't everybody know it and isn't it fucking obvious but still I pine for a world in which you love me and everything is perfect. It seems so simple.

And she kept asking me if I was taking the Spanish girl home and I said no and no and a thousand times I wonder what the hell I'm doing and I know you aren't worth a second of my time but I keep giving it to you.